saviorexe: (Default)
oh my rA9, it's robojesus. ([personal profile] saviorexe) wrote2018-09-04 06:13 pm

INBOX.



@markus.manfred | ■ ▲ ◌ ▼



strove: (i have so very many flaws)

[personal profile] strove 2019-01-17 04:59 am (UTC)(link)
All right. I don't want you to feel that you can't say your piece. That's important.

[And expressing stressors rather than writing them off as if they don't exist. It's easy to fall into that habit—which is a fact that Clarke knows all too well.

And then there's the bit with Matches. She told him once that he reminds her of Murphy. It's starting to sound like she was very, very spot on with that.]


Oddly enough, that bit tells me everything I'd ever need to know about Matches. He likely pushed you away because it's a way of protecting himself.

And I think in this case, he might think he has good reason to believe you'd choose Connor over him.

But you know all this already. It doesn't make it hurt less.
strove: (no - only jeff goldblum needs one)

[personal profile] strove 2019-01-17 07:27 am (UTC)(link)
I realize who I'm saying this to, but—have you considered that you're approaching this far too logically?
strove: (teal was a much better aesthetic)

[personal profile] strove 2019-01-17 07:25 pm (UTC)(link)
Again, I'm not Matches' biggest fan. But I am a big fan of yours, so keep that in mind.

He strikes me as the type to do what he feels is necessary to protect himself. That doesn't mean it makes sense or that it's rooted in any reality. Sometimes emotions just rule over any ability to really see what's going on. You telling me that it was never about a choice doesn't mean anything.

Hell, if he's stupid enough to think you'd give up on him that easily, after all the stupid stuff he's said on the network, then he's used to being second best.

You mediated, and he was cutting ties. Making it so the imaginary choice didn't exist in the first place.
strove: (I can make some frosting!)

[personal profile] strove 2019-01-18 04:57 am (UTC)(link)
Just don't be surprised if he doesn't make it easy on you.
strove: (no - only jeff goldblum needs one)

[personal profile] strove 2019-01-18 06:42 pm (UTC)(link)
I'm not friends with everyone having a difficult time.

So, just you and Connor. He wasn't very interested in hearing what I had to say.
strove: (teal was a much better aesthetic)

[personal profile] strove 2019-01-18 06:54 pm (UTC)(link)
[She deliberates on how much detail to get into here.]

We don't see eye to eye on how to handle potential problems like Matches. I don't want to cause problems here, and I assume the two of you have already spoke of his intentions.
strove: (plus Aaron Judge is hot right)

[personal profile] strove 2019-01-18 07:30 pm (UTC)(link)
[No, and she doesn't want to do the same. Clarke considers her words. It's hard to speak of this without making it about Connor's decisions or what she perceives to be incredible irrationality there. After a few long moments, she puts together a reply.]

I want to help you with Matches because I trust your judgment when it comes to him. Or rather—I want to trust your judgment. Until he acts in a way that actually puts us at risk and doesn't involve talking a big game, that's important. I've seen what happens when someone doesn't.

I understand Connor's stance. And your stance. But until someone acts in a way rather than just talking about it, we can't begin to speak of exiling one of our own. It can't even be on the table. There are too many unknown variables.

You asked me to keep an open mind about what I do moving forward. To not just see this all ending in killing whoever's responsible. And I am. I'm trying. I will. That's behavior informed by my life before, so I'd hope that you and Connor can do the same. And yes, I'm opposed to his solution because I've seen what happens in my world, but I don't think that makes me a hypocrite. Because I've made that mistake before.

More than anything, we've got to be careful about giving Matches a reason to think he's right. That he will just be pushed aside. And if it wasn't Matches and were, say ... me? Because you know what I'm capable of, even if Connor doesn't. Or an idea of it. I won't act irrationally, but sometimes a reasonable person can craft what seems to be a reasonable response in their head when everything's gone wrong. Or they can be so used to certain actions that they don't know anything else.

I guess I'm freewriting here. I don't want you to think that I think I'm at risk. I'm not. But we need to consider the precedent here because I have a feeling I've taken a lot more lives than Matches has. That's all.
Edited (clarifying the "his") 2019-01-18 19:32 (UTC)
strove: (should I start a patreon?)

[personal profile] strove 2019-01-18 07:55 pm (UTC)(link)
Not disagreeing can mean two different things. Especially when a friend is involved.

I'll be honest here. If Connor acts, I will push against it. I'm not saying that when he doesn't know. I think he has the idea now. I made it pretty clear.

I just feel bad because that makes you pulled between three people. It's not fair to you.
strove: (but isn't playing Jesus kind of boring?)

[personal profile] strove 2019-01-18 10:19 pm (UTC)(link)
If nothing else, no one will ever say I can't be objective.

[Given that Connor and Markus are both her friends ... and Matches decidedly isn't.]

I'll do what I can to keep it from getting to that point.